


mcyt oneshots // ongoing

by existentialcrisisx



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, mcyt
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Multi, Nihachu - Freeform, Ranboo - Freeform, Sad, TommyInnit - Freeform, Tubbo - Freeform, dream - Freeform, georgenotfound - Freeform, mcyt - Freeform, sapnap - Freeform, ships, wilbursoot - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:15:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29898234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/existentialcrisisx/pseuds/existentialcrisisx





	mcyt oneshots // ongoing

.•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•

"some infinities last longer than others."

\- hazel grace lancaster, the fault in our stars  
.•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•

at first, sapnap never believed in soulmates. the reliance solely on the myth that someone else out there apparently 'loved him' wasn't something he was willing to engage in; especially for the fact that anything that started as mutual adoration and involved him would most definitely end up in mutual heartbreak. that much was clear to see.

"your turn, dream?"

but when he initially locked eyes with dream, his perception of other aspects of love were thrown right out the window.

"yeah, sure."

love at first sight was also another thing that sapnap was detrimentally pessimistic of. again, when at seventeen years old, he first shared introductions with dream, that went down the drain immediately.

"uh, i'm dream. i'm eighteen years old, and i had a touch of osteosarcoma a year and a half ago. so i lost this baby as a result, and uh, i'm part cyborg, which is awesome. but really i'm just here; george's request," as he spoke, poked out his left leg slightly, flashing a bright, metallic silver.

"and uh, how are you feeling dream?" the group director inquired softly; stepping around the question as if it was a sensitive topic. or maybe that was just a softhearted personality shining through.

'softhearted; revolting,' sapnap normally would've rolled his eyes, however currently his hazel irises were intently fixated on dream.

"i'm grand, yeah. i'm on a rollercoaster that only goes up, my friend."

sapnap scoffed. 

'how completely and utterly sickening.'

stage four thyroid cancer, metastasized in his respiratory system.

it couldn't escalate much more for sapnap.

"you're a smoker?" sapnap inquired, eyeing suspiciously at the cigarette balanced perfectly in between dream's lips.

"nope," the dirty blonde answered simply, before continuing on to elaborate.

"it's a metaphor, see: you put the killing thing in between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do it's killing."

'a metaphor, huh?' sapnap thought, 

"cryptic bastard."

"yeah, my lungs kinda suck at being lungs," he murmured, for once softly spoken and tranquil. it was as if being around dream mellowed and softened out the feisty spark within sapnap; a personality trait that got him in trouble more often than not.

"ah," was all dream responded with.

it should've been roles reversed. it was meant to be, roles reversed, and sapnap wished such a truth existed. however now, all he could do was sit and long for the fact that maybe in another life, another dimension, universe, infinity altogether, that maybe that was the reality. his dreams were filled with their love, if only pure and eternal. while always it would be unconditional, their love story had written it's last page, and closed forever now.

"aye, sap? maybe 'okay' can be our always," dream whispered, gazing at george and his girlfriend, standing by the battered corolla he drove, and wouldn't for much longer. once his sight was gone completely, he'd lose a lot of legalities and rights purely because he'd be classified as 'impaired'. that word made sapnap's blood boil with disgust. it wasn't particularly bothered sapnap before, however he thought george was cool, and that was all it took for him to be even slightly invested in such topics of conversation; even if he never admitted it.

"okay, dream."

"okay, sapnap."

so many memories remained permanently implanted in the reel of film that his brain replayed over and over, each night a new reminiscence of sorts. and no matter how many times he longed his subconscious state to cease the mention of such purely heart shattering thoughts, they never dissolved. they never evaporated back into something blanker, without substance or meaning or any sentimentality whatsoever.

they never went away.

"you say you're not special because the world doesn't know about you, but that's an insult to me. i know about you," dream always had a way with words, and still he used it to his advantage; even being confined to such a way of life that it frustrated him to a point of unexplainable rage.

roles reversed but not in a good way.

sapnap was gentler and more mellow; and acted exactly the way dream had, in the beginning. if dream was now a bitter, unfiltered coffee, then sapnap was now the sweetener. they balanced each other out in a way only they could.

"smartass," sapnap teased, crossing his arms.

"only for you," dream laughed, his breathy wheeze of a cackle that sapnap had grown a desperate adoration for. 

see, like all good love stories; theirs would end with them. once a flourishing, healthy rose; now was simply just a fragile heap of petals, cracked and dry. with one touch, the evidence of existence could be erased completely.

july second was the day everything came collapsing down around sapnap.

all was quiet as he lay under the covers. they provided some kind of comfort for the fact that dream's scent clung to them.

the peacefulness was something he missed dearly.

it was their little infinity, and while it defied the definition of the word altogether, both were aware of the fact it wouldn't last forever. for of course, some infinities last longer thaners.

sapnap jolted awake to the sound of the hallway landline phone ringing, loudly and obnoxiously.

racing down the stairs as fast as he could, provided for the fact that he was still half asleep and carried the oxygen tank behind him, finally the boy reached the phone before it rang out, and answered.

"hello?" he murmured breathlessly.

"sapnap. he's gone."

his heart snapped clean in half.

dear wilbur,

i'm a good person, but a shitty writer. you're a shitty person, but a good writer. i think we'd make a good team. i don't want to ask you for any favours, but if you have the time; and from what i saw, you have plenty..please fix this for me.

it's a eulogy for sapnap. he asked me to write one, and i'm trying. i just, i could use a little flair. see, the thing is, we all want to be remembered. but sapnap's different. sapnap knows the truth. he didn't want a million admirers; he just wanted one. and he got it.

maybe he wasn't loved widely, but he was loved deeply. and isn't that more than most of us get? when sapnap was sick, i knew i was dying..but i didn't want to say so. he was in the icu and i snuck in for ten minutes and i sat with him, before i got caught. his eyes were closed. his skin, pale. but his hands were still his hands; still warm and his nails were painted this dark blue / black colour, and, i just held them. and i willed myself to imagine a world without us..and what a worthless world that would be. 

he's so beautiful. you don't get tired of looking at him. you never worry if he's smarter than you because you know he is. he's funny without ever being mean; i love him. god, i love him; i'm so lucky to love him wilbur.

you don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have a say in who hurts you. and i like my choices. 

i hope he likes his.

okay, sapnap?

\- dream <3

the resounding ache in his chest lingered there.

"dream, i love you. and you won't ever hear this, and our infinity is over. but i love you, and i always will, even if the sky is falling in and the world is ending. even if i never get to see you again because maybe the myth you so desperately invested all your belief in about a second life is bullshit. but that doesn't change the fact that i love you. okay dream?" sapnap's voice cracked huskily, tears rolling down his cheeks as he farewelled his best and most loyal friend.

and he couldn't discern whether the following words were really there or just a figment of his imagination, but the response was loud and clear.

"okay sapnap."

see that's the thing about pain; it demands to be felt.


End file.
